Stories From The Head

Jammermann Breaks An Egg This is a brief recollection of the history of the Juzzunian people, more precicely - THE AGE OF JAMMERMANN: Year:         Event: 0             Jammermann is born. 3             Jammermann's mother, Gwæk, is born. 3             Jammermann reaches manhood. 3             Jammermann reaches puberty. 7             The Nine Secret Eggs Of Justice are scattered across the Juzzunian continent. 9             Jammermann reads about The Nine Secret Eggs Of Justice in a magazine entitled "The Nine Secret Eggs Of Justice - weekly". 18            Jammermann decides to set out on a quest to find The Nine Secret Eggs Of Justice. 19            Ulguck, Jammermann's nemesis, is born. 24            Jammermann realizes that he cannot afford to search for the eggs. 38            Jammermann decides to get a job. 38            Jammermann gets a job. 38            Jammermann loses his job, because of his striking inability to show up for work. 38            Jammermann's mother, Gwæk, lends Jammermann the money to search for The Nine Secret Eggs Of Justice. 38            The year "38" is voted "Most Eventful Year So Far" by the readers of "The Nine Secret Eggs Of Justice - weekly". 47            Jammermann sets out on his quest. 49            Jammermann realizes he has forgotten NOT to spend the money his mother lent him. 49            Jammermann returns home. His mother, Gwæk, is not happy. 50            Gwæk decides to accompany Jammermann on his quest. Jammermann is not happy. 55            They set out. 79            Jammermann and Gwæk uncover the first egg. It has been smashed to a pulp. The egg was discovered in the village of Mjøsa, and the "villagers" tell Jammermann and Gwæk that Ulguck has been seen in the area. 83            Jammermann utters the words "Ulguck may well be my nemesis". 88            Gwæk nods in agreement. 89            Jammermann reads an article in the magazine "The Eight Remaining Secret Eggs Of Justice - weekly" that Ulguck has smashed three of the eggs, which he found in a box in his grandfather's attic. 89            Jammermann publishes an article in the magazine "There Are Still Five Secret Eggs Of Justice - weekly", stating, officially, that Ulguck is his nemesis. 91            Gwæk reads the article, and nods her head in agreement. 98            One of The Secret Eggs Of Justice is stolen by a bear. 103           The bear is captured and interrogated, but it reveals nothing, due to language problems. 107           An old midget called Bæhbø writes a letter to Jammermann, claiming to be in possession of two Secret Eggs Of Justice. 109           Jammermann catches up with Bæhbø, who, while enjoying a meal consisting of scrambled eggs and pizza, reveals that the eggs have mysteriously disappeared. 111           A connection between the meal and the disappearance of the eggs is established. Bæhbø is put to sleep. 159           Three Secret Eggs Of Justice are thrown, by Ulguck, at a troupe of actors, presumably to show his disapproval of their comedic performance. The leader of the troupe, Lærke, is later quoted as being "shocked". 161           Jammermann publishes an article in the magazine "Where On Earth Is The Remaining Secret Egg Of Justice? (The One That The Bear Stole, Remember?) - weekly", stating that Jammermann is really angry, and claiming that Ulguck is "an idiot". 164           Jammermann locates the bear in the dungeons of Cabbah. Using sign-language, the bear tells Jammermann that the egg is in his left pocket. 172           Jammermann locates the bear's left pocket. and removes the egg. 172           Jammermann jumps up and down, celebrating the discovery of the last Secret Egg Of Justice. 172           Jammermann accidentaly drops the egg. 172           The egg breaks. 172           Jammermann commits suicide. 277           Gwæk reads the article Jammermann published in the year 161. She nods her head in agreement. 278           Gwæk marries the bear. 299           The Age Of Jammermann ends, and The Age Of Gwæk And The Bear begins...

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