Stories From The Head

Not Enough   Soppadakki was late. He’d been doing his annual Frihatt-shopping, and forgotten all about his duties as a Master Of Hud. NOW! The problem was that he loved performing both of these operations, but there just wasn’t enough time. He had constructed a mathematical theory that he applied to the problem:   Frihatt-shopping + Master Of Hud-duties ---------------------------------------    =    NOT ENOUGH! Amount of time   People from all over the world, of all ages and religious beliefs travelled to Soppadakki’s home to try to solve the equation. There was Wallip, a lonely hadygian midget, Fruhup, his brother, Mjøsomar, king of Dæskenhode, and Bror, son of Far. Even from the distant republic of Åsemord a carriage had been chartered to transport people to Soppadakki, and more importantly – his equation. Here is a list of passengers in the carriage:   Princess Hagebæsh, not really a princess, as Åsemord is a republic   Oderapa, unknown   Presidentflua, bastard son of Hæpsburg the musician   Rotekopp, the tidiest person in the world   Motordur, well...he doesn’t need any introduction, does he? Well, DOES HE??!   Although Soppadakki didn’t realise it at the time, all of these people were there for a purpose other than solving the equation. They were there to KILL Soppadakki, which they did. Two years later a young cat named Homer took one look at the now extremely famous equation and proclaimed with enormous pizzazz: ”THIS EQUATION CAN NEVER BE SOLVED. NOT NOW, NOT WHEN SOPPADAKKI HAS BEEN RUTHLESSLY MURDERED!” The funny thing is...he was right...

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