Stories From The Head

Pepper Ebbekopf vs. The Hat It was a lovely day, and Pepper Ebbekopf was making the last adjustments to his rope. This wasn’t easy, considering the fact that his rope was not a rope, but his uncle Tupel, DISGUISED as a rope. (A well-known prankster, uncle Tupel had planned a little joke on his nephew: One second (exactly) before Pepper scaled the top of the hat, he would make his identity known. It was going to be a truly hilarious moment). Pepper didn’t want to hurt his uncle’s feelings, so, even though he’d instantly called the bluff, he decided to play along. He tied his rope/uncle to his backpack, and started the long walk towards the hat. The clouds shifted and the sky grew dark, but Pepper was undeterred. Today was the day he would conquer the hat. Having walked across the brim, he started on the mighty side of the hat, tying his rope to the wicker-straps the hat was constructed from. About midway up, Pepper felt a light drizzle on his forehead, and soon he was soaked to the bone. The rain had come, and wicker becomes extremely slippery when wet. He tried to hold on, but it was inevitable – Pepper fell down. Bruised and battered, he made camp on the outskirts of the brim. He was NOT a happy camper. Literally. Two days passed, and Pepper’s food was running out. He was cold, and, to his great annoyance, uncle Tupel insisted on keeping up the uncle/rope-charade. In the afternoon the clouds parted, and the sun could again cast its beautiful rays on the mighty hat. Pepper acted immediately. The slippery wicker-straps dried instantly in the sun, and Pepper’s grip was secure and fast. The climb took less than three hours, and Pepper was out of his mind with excitement. He was just about to scale the top of the hat, when the rope suddenly gave way. It was uncle Tupel. He’d had a heart-attack. As he fell, Pepper damned his uncle. And he damned himself for playing along. His uncle’s heart-condition had simply slipped his mind. Pepper Ebbekopf readied himself for his imminent death. A second before impact, his eyes managed to focus on a small dot moving up the side of the hat. It was a small spider, glistening in the sun. “I wonder who that is…”, Pepper thought to himself. He died with a smile on his face…

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